Drawing by Betty Dodson

Dear Goddess of Masturbation,

Allow me to reintroduce myself: My name is Wendy and I am the ballsy girl who decided to approach you after being denied entry by campus security: The masses of other horny girls were swarming your virtues. They said it was a breech of fire code, but I think you were the only one in danger of this fire code. My loins were aflame because of you! And I couldn't take my eyes off your firm ass and butch-like stance. Very intriguing, all the photos I've seen of you, looking the most femme with makeup and hairspray, and femme-smile. Yet in person you reveled a strong, sexy, obscure butch. Ahhh, all the fantasies I can create with just that knowledge alone! I would love to meet you again; when/where are your next appearances?

I have two questions:

When I masturbate, I use a lot of mental imagery to bang me into orgasm. I find that in some of my masturbating moments (as well as in partner sex) it takes me a lot longer to release an orgasm if I don't visualize nasty play (sometimes not at all, unless I revert back to imagery) I don't believe this is a nuisance for me, as I love to visualize kinky things being done to me, my partner, or someone else not related in our play while being fucked or while I'm masturbating. However, it would also be magnificent to just rely on the manual stimulation and sensation being presently done to me rather than digging into my imagination. Being a woman, I've heard that for the most part we need the sensation of sex, and men tend to do the visualizing. I would like some advice or tips on how to orgasm without always going into my database of sexual perversion. Is there a relaxation technique?

My next question is:

I would love to be a provider of sexual education, sexual excitement, and sexual freedom. How does one begin this journey? Is Higher Education a necessity, or does self experience, self-knowledge, and knowledge gained through the vast number of materials out there enough preparation for a life in this wonderful industry?

Thank you, Betty!
Sunny

[ Orgasmic Women info ]   [Celebrating Orgasm info ]   Viva la Vulva, Info

Dear Sunny,

Thanks for your hot compliments. You sure know how to make a grandmother feel good. And you are adorable - what I call a pushy bottom that knows how to get what she wants. I will make appearances on the West coast and Canada in May but check out my website for other appearances this summer and fall. I hope you have seen my new DVD Orgasmic Women. It's a fantastic teaching tool. I an also busy working on a new book.

As for your questions: It's great that you have a wealth of sexual fantasies. The other way to go is simply paying attention to what your body is feeling or "sensate focus." In other words, when you focus on the body's sensations only, masturbation becomes more like a sexual meditation. I did this for many years but now I'm more into imagining different fantasies. Conjuring up images and scenarios that I combine with sexual energy leading to orgasm is at the heart of the creative process. So don't censor yourself. Just enjoy. And for variety, every now and then, simply put all of your attention on what your body is experiencing by paying attention to your breathing or focus completely on the sensations in your clitoris.

There are as many paths to becoming a sex educator or provider of sexual excitement and freedom, as there are people. Every time we have a sex conversation with a friend, we are educating by simply sharing our personal experiences. To work as a private therapist or educator in the school system requires schooling and credentials. To be a sex worker takes smarts and guts. Being a performance artist who does sexual material on stage is another route. Then there's writing, photographing, videotaping and drawing sex. So you see, the list goes on and on.

In the near future, I will be producing another video. If you are interested in being involved as one of my actors, let me know. You can be partially disguised by wearing a wig, or be yourself. Take anther look at the rest of my video Celebrating Orgasm. One woman was herself, but the others all wore wigs. It's amazing how a different hair color changes a person's appearance. I will be doing a video on partnersex and another one on my Private Sessions in the near future. You can get back to me if this interests you. Meanwhile keep on loving yourself.

Betty

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