FEEDBACK FORUM

Dr. Jocelyn Elders

Dear Dr. Betty,
In spite of the work of people such as yourself, young women still have hang ups about masturbation and many, I've found, still don't even know "what works" in terms of achieving orgasm. While it's fun to experiment and explore (I'm a man of infinite patience), I'm still astounded by this - even after nearly 40 years of women's liberation. Obviously, you're still finding this to be true as well (otherwise your business would be much slower).
My hunch is that it still stems from a tacit - if not explicit - "masturbation ist verboten" message that girls are still getting while growing up. Assuming that Karl Rove hasn't completely rigged the last two elections and there really WAS a public outcry to replace FDR on the dime with Ronald Reagan, obviously we've "reverted" in this country back to some serious prudishness.
My questions are: a) Besides what you write in your "Credo", how else can we combat this? b) Do you think females could benefit from mentors such as yourself at an earlier age (provided we had more permissive and realistic statutory ideas in this country - like in many countries in western Europe)? c) What would you recommend to parents raising daughters in terms of strategy/tactics of promoting a more positive body image and masturbation/orgasm-affirming up-bringing? Because that's where all the problems start.
Perhaps it's a pipe-dream in this country, but I think Jocelyn Elders was at the START of being on the right track. What do you think?
Clay

Dear Clay,
Yes, it can get quite disheartening to see our younger generation being raised on the abstinence-only until marriage message that stands in for sex education. Our rogue government has poured millions into this worthless program that caters to the most conservative elements in Christianity. All in the name of securing votes.
Jocelyn Elders simply said that she "thought masturbation might be something that could be taught." But her insight was profound. Masturbation is natural and makes life more pleasant. Teaching it improves one's mind, body and spirit.
As someone who has actually been teaching masturbation, I can easily point a finger at organized religions as the most sexually repressive force in American society. Catholics and Mormons forbid it as do many other protestant denominations. What a perfect way to control a population: sexual guilt. Throw in Karl's brilliant understanding of how to keep people afraid and you've got a large part of the answer to women's continued sexual repression. As I said in my latest book, Orgasms for Two: "We haven't come a long way, Baby!"
How can we combat this? A. Get religion out of government and get on board with truthout.com. B. Follow through on what Jocelyn mentioned and teach our teens that masturbation is a pleasurable alternative to partnersex until they are older. C. Parents can have several good sex books on their shelves including "Sex for One." Many moms have told me how helpful my book was after her teenage daughter read it.
We have not only "reverted back to serious prudishness" but we are racing toward fascism which always begins with sexual repression. Take heed Americans!
Betty