Hi Betty,

My girlfriend of 8 years is just not that interested in having sex w/ me. I love sex and have felt uninhibited with previous women. She is very reserved and self-protective, emotionally and physically. When we have sex (every few months) it's repetitive and short; she humps me and comes quickly then fingers me, then I take over to make myself come. I almost always have to initiate sex and, since I love aggression and sexual confidence at times, this is yucky and makes me feel undesirable (though I'm not).

During sex my GF puts her head down as if hiding. We do tell hot fantasies to each other but nothing intimate, about us, nor will she talk about sex at other times. She used to put a dildo in her pants but feels shy about strapping it on, which I love. She's gone down on me three times. She's a hygiene freak so maybe my pussy seems "dirty." We are in couples therapy and she's in individual counseling. I know she's trying to deal w/ family and temperament issues and to open up. She's working on being more affectionate and is trying to touch me more on an everyday basis.

She has a huge job working overnight shifts right now. I'm pregnant w/ our second child. The lack of sex with gusto is excruciating.

Any ideas? Thank you.

Roberta