Hello Betty, I am in need of some help or advice of any kind. i am 32 yr old female and have been in a relationship for 8 yrs. with a 34 yr old woman who has no desire for sexuality, sensuality, or passion of any kind and i am going absolutely nuts! i do have a very healthy drive and for the first 5/6 mos in the relationship so did she. Now we have some sort of sexual contact anywhere between once in 3-4 mos to a few times a year, the longest we have gone without was a year and a half. i have tried sensual massage, pampering her, wining and dining, couples counseling (which ended up with the counselor saying there was nothing she could do because my partner was unwilling to try), buying an arsenal of toys, xxx movies, sexy games, and fun tasty lubes, and herbal supplements etc. we have talked extensively about the problem but she just says that if i love her i will wait until she gets back on track but i have waited SO long i don't know what else to do! There are no medical problems but she does say that it was my fault for everything being messed up because i loved her and was honest and open and no one else ever did that???? i still don't really understand that. we still sleep in the same bed in the nude and that is torture within its self so i just get up and take a bath or get on the computer to redirect my attention until she gets up, but i don't think i can do this much longer. please help! loveless in las vegas