Drawing by Betty Dodson

Dr. Betty!

I just finished the final page of Orgasms for Two. Simply put, it changed my outlook on sex, my future, and my life in general.

First, let me give you some background on myself. I am a 21 year old heterosexual male university student standing 5' 8" and weighing in at a lean 150 lbs. I have a 6 and one-half inch penis in length which I am now much more comfortable with thanks to your book. I almost hesitate to call it a "book" because that word does not do it justice...how does The Sex Bible sound? I have been sexually active for more than 5 years, although I've been having partnersex sparingly in recent months.(I warn you, partnersex will not be the last term I borrow from you, I hope you don't mind!) I use the phrase "sexually active" very loosely since the sex I've had has been quite uneducated, especially on the female side.

Even though I've had over a dozen different partners, I wouldn't say that I had great sex (meaning orgasms for both of us) with more than a few. You are completely accurate when you say that most young people are MISeducated. I can remember when I was 16 and desperately trying to finger my girlfriend's "g-spot." Somehow, I always knew there was something wrong with the way my sex sessions were going. Basically, everything up to the last page of your book has been prelude to what I expect from sex now.

I get extremely excited by an orgasmic woman. In fact, my first question pertains to this. In your novel, you state that when you and Eric first met, he was prone to coming as his partner was rising to climax. This is the same issue that I have. The heat that surrounds my penis, the sounds that come from the woman, and her bodily responses are the most beautiful and arousing combination of sensory input a man can receive all at once. My question is how did Eric overcome this? In order to take control of my "cum control," I need to remain motionless and this is not exactly desirable for the woman at this point of her climax. As you also mentioned, at this point, the woman begins to rock her hips more violently, and this spells trouble for me. Do I just need to work harder on my cum control?

My second issue is with women. I know it's not their fault, but where are these "sexually sophisticated women" you speak of? I'm a University student, the most uptight upper-middle-class university in the most uptight upper-middle-class town you can imagine. I'm also a pre-med student, so I don't have the time to start from scratch with the girls I meet. I also like to party, so I'm always on the lookout, but I just can't seem to find a partnerless young woman that is comfortable with her sexuality (self-loving alone is not cutting it for me these days). Most of them are more like Medusa's victims. I also don't really trust the adult "find-a-partner-in-ten-minutes-or-less (and for only $20/month)" websites out there. Am I doomed to take on the role of the teacher? Or do I need to start looking at some older age groups hoping to find out that it isn't the same story?

I also often find myself with women that are tall enough to make certain positions difficult as I don't swing a big package. What positions could you recommend for partners of similar height that like to shake things up. Also, I'd like to buy a dildo to use for clitoral stimulation on whomever ends up being my partner. Being a student, my money is a little tight, so I will likely only buy one, should it be the Magic Wand, or should I just wait until I find a compatible partner (I agree completely that sexual compatibility is critical) and find out her preference?

Finally, I'd like to offer you a little praise. Your sex bible was not only extremely informative, but it was well written, well illustrated, and very entertaining. I looked forward to finishing a chapter every night after a self-loving session. I even thoroughly enjoyed your sex for seniors chapter as it was also informative, even for someone who didn't see the swingin' sixties, or the seventies for that matter (I'm especially fond of your "Fuck Bar" fantasy, it's one I'd love to act out!). Your talk about a "meditative state," (pg. 211) reminded me of another book I read, called "Red Hot Tantra," by David Armsdale. If you have not thought about looking into tantra for more intense orgasms, I strongly recommend this book. It provides several interesting combinations of breathing techniques and positions that have different erotic effects.

I am also in agreement with you that we, socially speaking, should be comfortable enough with sex and sexuality to discuss it publicly (and it really gets to me that organized religion has really been the antagonist here. So, as a future doctor or psychiatrist, what do you feel is a message today's doctors are not giving their patients? I'd love to help pass along your message to future generations!

I apologize for the length of the email, but I hope that it gives you hope for future generations as, from my experience at least, many generation X-ers are lacking tons of information on how to live healthy and satisfying sex lives, which of course translates into happier lives as a whole.

Thank you for writing this sex bible. You've provided me with the tools I need to be happy sexually for decades to come. you're my favorite kind of feminist!! I'm all for female empowerment and independency.

Your fan,

V. Prince