Dr. Betty,

Enjoyed your website tremendously, I am wondering if you do private sessions with men? I'm a 49 yr old male who thinks he has pre-mature ejaculation? SometimesI last longer than others...and would really like an experts opinion. I also enjoy masturbation immensly and that usually last longer then sex with a woman. Is that normal?

waiting for your reply,Thanks
Jamie

Dear Jamie: First I no longer do private sessions with men. I scarcely have time for private sessions with the many women who ask for help every day, so something had to give. Second your problem is self treatable. You don't need my help. I never get into judgents like "nomal" and neither should you. Premature orgasm is very common in young men. Masturbation will be the key to learning how to sustain higher levels of sexual arousal before ejaculating. The fact that you seem to be able control your ejaculation when you masturbate alone is good. That means you only lack experience with control in heightened situations with women. My assistant Eric said it took him a year of practicing come control with masturbation before he could keep from ejaculating when he was inside his first girlfriend's vagina. Eric said he began his masturbation session by paying attention to the sensations in his penis as he jacked off. What felt good, what felt neutral and what really got his build-up going. Take time to get in touch with your entire arousal process during many masturbation sessions. The squeeze technique. Just before you feel the surge toward ejaculation, you stop stimulation and press your thumb and finger just under the rim of your glans. The urethral tube runs up the underside of your penis and that's the tube the semen travels through. Squeezing it helps to retard ejaculation. The start/stop method. Start by taking notice of the specific feelings you get just before your ejaculation begins. Once you've identified those sensations, during your next session, take your hand completely away from your penis as they begin. Don't touch your penis until those feelings have subsided. Then begin again, and once more, pay close attention to what you're feeling. Your orgasm will gradually approach and once again, take your hand away before ejaculation sets in. After you can't take it anymore, go ahead and blow. Another helpful technique is keeping your pelvic floor muscle relaxed or bearing down a bit. Deep belly breathing can also help. The opposite of holding your breath or tightening up on the pelvic floor muscle, which will make you shoot. The PC muscle in men is the same as in women. When a woman wants to come, she tightens it and the same seems to be true for men. So keep things relaxed during stimulation to help delay ejaculation. Check out my information on getting in touch with your PC muscle. It's the one that stops the flow of urine. Read the info in www.bettydodson.com/barbell2.htm Also check into: How to Overcome Premature Ejaculation by Helen Singer Kaplan which is available through Amazon.com at $13.56. Let me know what happens. Betty