Hi Betty,

We are two friends with the same problem: one 27, the other 28. We have never had an orgasm! We also never had a long term relationship and began having sex quite late compared to the average 21 and 22 yo. We both feel the desire to have sex and we have it when we can. This is our situation:

G: About selfsex. I don't masturbate at all. Whenever I feel excited, I lose it as soon as I start touching me; when I'm in bed with a guy I don't feel much. I enjoy being with him, I desire sex, but it's like my vagina doesn't follow my brain. It annoys me having my clit stimulated. I feel more excited when I'm in a bar with him and he kisses me and I know what might happen later.

M: My problem is not getting aroused but that I lose it halfway! It happens both when I masturbate (not as often though!) or when I am having intercourse. It is like at some point I can't feel anymore and I get bored, lose interest and just wait for him to finish. I thought it was because I had sex with people I did not care about. Then I fell in love with this guy and could never get enough of him! But still, no orgasm! We are aware that we should know ourselves a bit better, probably through masturbation but we are getting scared that we will never find out what an orgasm is!

Help us please!