Dear Sharon, Congratulations on taking charge of your body and sexual development. If all young women prepared their vaginas for penetration, first-time partnersex would be far more consistently pleasurable instead of painful. Getting in touch with your pelvic floor muscles will help to minimize feelings of pain or discomfort while penetrating your vaginal canal. First get yourself turned on by doing a vulva massage that includes some manual clitoral stimulation. Then after you have squeezed your PC muscle tight and released it, push slightly with the larger end of the Barbell. Watch yourself doing this in a mirror with a good light source and repeat the process many times. This will gradually relax your vaginal muscles. Remember to use plenty of lubrication on the Barbell, breathe deeply and focus on squeezing and releasing the muscle. The larger ball is a fairly good measure for the head of a penis. But it’s metal and the head of a penis is much softer and will conform somewhat to the space it is entering. In my sex shop, Mr. Smoothie would be an example of a well-endowed man. The Strawberry toy would represent a medium sized penis except it’s longer than most with the dial on the bottom. A man’s penis erect varies quite a bit, from 4 and a half to seven or eight inches and they have varying diameters. Then there are the rare 10 and 12 inch penises that the porn producers prefer. I look forward to hearing about your wonderful first time when you’re ready to embrace partnersex. Betty